I wasn't sure what or how much I wanted to change so instead I focused on the critiques I recieved in class when I first presented this project. I have a lot of mixed feelings about both of them and spent a lot of time trying different things. Feedback welcome.
It's a beautiful piece, it really does radiate Bowie's energy. I think most of the changes you made to the text improve the design, though I do think the effect with the gradient that was seen on his name in the original is stronger than the new translucent look. For the quote, be careful about the dash after "true", right now it looks like you have a hyphen there rather than an em dash, and also I believe it's usually recommended that there are no spaces on either of an em dash. Also if you omitted part of the quote, I think you need to add "..." where it was removed, but I'm not entirely sure if that would be required or not, Coni I'm sure could answer.
ReplyDeleteOn the illustration itself, I notice a line of lighter skin stretching up from his middle finger across his jaw. Is this part of the original image?
Because Bowie as a VERY colorful performer, I agree that maybe the styling of the first heading adds that "over the top" approach that would be very appropriate here.
ReplyDeleteYes, if you are using only a section of a quote it is correct to add an ellipse "..." to tell us you've done that.
Lastly - the composition has improved in your rework, moving the text blocks away from the figure to activate the right hand space better. However, I see that you are using 2 different centered lines, one for the top block of text and another for the bottom block of text. Why? Wouldn't this seem more unified and settled if, instead, you establish 1 vertical center line, and use it for both? Right now it is just a little different, and looks like a design mistake.
It's very impressive I do feel like the text on the first one fits his style more.
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